| GIVE ME THE EYE!!! |
[Nov. 11th, 2009|11:53 am] |
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
GASP!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
GASP!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! |
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| Shiny |
[Nov. 9th, 2009|06:21 pm] |
A friend of mine said to me yesterday that he was concerned that I was going bald because I shave my head.
I told him that it doesn't really matter if I'm going bald because I shave my head.
See there? Logic. |
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| Mmmmmm...Tuuuurkeeeeey. |
[Nov. 8th, 2009|07:24 pm] |
Early Thanksgiving with friends is always a good time.
I'm just glad Bill and Tim decided they wanted turkey early. :)
So now I am full and happy and ready to play lots and lots of video games.
Go me! |
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| CRAAAAAVE!!! |
[Nov. 6th, 2009|10:48 am] |
I really want a peppermint mocha.
I have no idea why. |
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| Academicals |
[Nov. 4th, 2009|02:41 pm] |
EEE!
I gotted the new Terry Pratchett book today. Yes, I'm slow. Slow and poor. Sue me.
Anyway, I'm still waiting for "I Shall Wear Midnight", Terry. Forget about your brain rebelling against you and give to me the Tiffany Aching novel, please.
kthxbai. |
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| Strange Conversations |
[Nov. 2nd, 2009|11:32 pm] |
As much as I bitch, I do love my family.
I love my family enough to tease them on the internet.
So... I get this call and my phone says it's from my brother. I'm like, cool, my brother's calling. This is new and unexpected.
I pick up the phone and say hello and a strange voice just kind of blurts out "I want a pair of those PJs."
Huh?
Who the hell are you and how do you know about my jammies in MAINE!?! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY BROTHER, YOU BASTARD!?!
I think Ed's going to have to have a conversation with my nephew Andrew about introducing himself on the telephone prior to making jammie demands. Not only that, if he'd like them for Christmas he should probably treat it like a Jeopardy clue and phrase it in the form of a question. Something like, "Uncle Bob, I really like the PJs you wore for Halloween. Would you get me a pair of those jammies for Christmas?"
The good thing about this is now I have something to tease the boy about until he's 90.
Apparently, the other kids would like a pair as well. I sense a lot of money spent on fleece this winter. |
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| I'm SUPER! |
[Nov. 1st, 2009|04:42 pm] |
I cleared out all 13 of the Dead Hero maps for the Bloodmoon event in Champions today! It actually feels like an accomplishment. I be happy and can now use Celestial powers.
Now to clear out the other 4 parts of the event. |
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| War of the Footie Jammies |
[Oct. 30th, 2009|06:44 pm] |
For those of you following me on Facebook, you may have noticed that there is a bit of a tug-of-war involving the primary component of my Halloween costume.
Ya see... my giant, spawn-bearing, ready-to-burst little sister really likes the footie jammies I bought to complete my ensemble of "creepy kid". There's a problem, though, because I really like them, too. They's comfy.
But, I felt bad because it felt selfish of me to keep the jammies away from the GSBRTBLS.
So I ordered her her own pair. I can't do stuff like that often, but they were clearance so it wasn't too great a hardship.
My big brotherly duties are done and now a pregnant woman can remain toasty warm in the great, white North of Maine.
And now I can lord the jammies over her when I go home. |
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| Just plain wrong... |
[Oct. 28th, 2009|08:33 pm] |
Wow.
Wrong Turn 3 is a giant, steaming puddle of unicorn vomit.
I call it "unicorn vomit" because it's so very rare that I find a horror movie that I hate so much I actually turn it off.
This wasn't good bad. It was bad bad. |
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| PAR-TAY! |
[Oct. 25th, 2009|12:46 pm] |
I love costume parties. The creativity that comes out is kind of mind-blowing.
One thing I've learned over the years is that you can go for sexy or you can go for scary or you can go for cute but you should always go for weather-appropriate. I'm very glad that my costume was what it was. It was COLD last night.
Something I learned last night is that creepy and cute kinda drive guys a little nuts. A thing to remember.
I've also learned that if you don't wear anything UNDER your costume, it's pretty much an open invitation. I don't necessarily have a problem with this. Also? Fleece footie jammies? A little bit of a fetish for some folks.
Here's some pictures from last night. |
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| Darling... HEEHEE! |
[Oct. 24th, 2009|02:32 am] |
If you, like myself, have a love of the old Hammer Horror flicks, catch I Sell the Dead.
It's kind of Fearless Vampire Killers-y with a bit of Shawn of the Dead thrown in and it's all cute and kind of steampunk-like. Really, the name says it all in terms of plot. It's got a great cast including Dominic Monaghan and Ron Perlman and it's a ton of ghoulish fun. It almost seems like it would be the perfect movie for Elvira to host. This is family-friendly horror (barring a little bit of language) but in a good way.
I heartily approve.
Now... Saw VI.
BEST DEATH EVER! The franchise is losing a little bit of steam plot-wise. I mean, how long can they really keep this going? Eventually, they're going to run out of people that Jigsaw has even met in passing. It did have a fantastic message about insurance companies, though, and I did thoroughly enjoy it. The twists and turns were all there and it had it's fair share of fish-mouth moments for me. It was also a lot of fun watching the spider-web that Jigsaw laid out start to unravel. I will say that while this one had more than it's share of gore, there wasn't quite so much of the splatter. The traps, while still fantastic and the main reason I watch these movies, are getting... more refined? It doesn't quite fit, I know, and maybe it's because the director is honing his craft, but the gore was almost subdued. Like it was still present but secondary to the horror of the game itself. I appreciated that. As with all of the Saw films, not for the kiddies. Teens might get a kick out of it, though.
OH, and speaking of the kiddies, I'm settling in with my popcorn and a woman ACTUALLY SAT A BABY CARRIER NEXT TO ME!
Bitch, this is SAW! Hire a fucking sitter. If that baby cried, I swear I was ready to fling it behind me like a beach ball at a concert and make the bitch hunt for it. The kid was mercifully silent, though. |
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| Creeeeeeepy... |
[Oct. 23rd, 2009|05:12 pm] |
So, it being a day ending in "y", I'm watching a buttload of horror movies.
The first one today was the remake of It's Alive, which was OK. It could have used a bit more tension and a bit less of Bijou Phillips' baby doll voice. It was CGI-tastic which isn't always a good thing, but it was an OK popcorn flick.
I finally caught Outpost, which was also kind of meh. I didn't really get to pay attention to it, though, and it looks like one of those movies you have to be engrossed in.
Home Movies was kind of awesome in an understated way. Yes, it's filmed like a home movie so it's got a little bit of a Blair Witch vibe to it. It could have been creepier but the fact that the kids don't say a damn thing until 2/3s of the way through makes it kinda chilly. Adrian Pasdar does a decent job as the minister dad. Plus, for the furries out there, he looks cute-ish in a pink bunny suit.
Homecoming, so far is a weak Misery clone. It's OK, but I haven't gotten to the really good stuff, yet, I guess.
Tonight? Saw VI. SQUEEEE! |
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| On the subject of dangerous and cuddly... |
[Oct. 20th, 2009|05:55 pm] |
I'm watching Being Human, now.
Absolutely stunning. I likes it oodles and bunches.
And Russell Tovey is extra cute. I don't normally go for smooth, but he's lickable.
Thank you, British Watershed. Thank you. |
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| Hmmmmmmm.... |
[Oct. 20th, 2009|12:01 pm] |
In watching Heroes, I caught something...
Ray Park has put on a few pounds.
That makes him dangerous AND cuddly. |
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| Misogynistic Neanderthals |
[Oct. 18th, 2009|10:51 pm] |
Doghouse.
A pert little cunt of a virus-zombie flick. It's got a hint of 28 Days Later, a dash of The Screwfly Solution, and lovely afterburn of Jack Ketchum's Ladies' Night.
It's not as snappy as Shawn of the Dead, but it makes great use of stereotypes for humor's sake.
Ahh, those British scamps.
I say give it a go. |
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| Some candy'd be dandy, Randy! |
[Oct. 18th, 2009|07:06 pm] |
Am I the only person in the world that really liked the movie Pandemonium?
Come on! It's Tom Smothers and Paul Reubens and Carol Kane!
The homeless guy with the dirty pillows!
"I hope you're watching Mr Decay, 'cause I'm gonna brush extra hard!"
"I'm gonna be like everybody else! I'm gonna make friends! I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna wear make-up, I'm gonna go out with boys, I'm gonna sleep with truck drivers and get crabs, and I'm gonna finally get to use my diaphragm!"
"My cookies!"
That movie was comedy gold. |
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| All in the Dysfunctional Family |
[Oct. 16th, 2009|11:19 pm] |
I went to go see The Stepfather tonight.
Meh.
It's not great. It's not bad. It's not anything.
There's not a huge body count, there's no blood, no gore, the suspense is tossed out the window in the first 5 minutes and the performances, beyond that of Sela Ward who was actually very good as a woman who just wants to find happiness following what appears to be a fairly bitter divorce, just fell flat. Dylan Walsh... there's SO much to work from in this movie and he could have chewed the scenery but he just didn't. I saw glimmers of the OCD in the character that would have fed his need for a perfect family, but he dropped the ball AND left himself wide open for being caught. I found myself WISHING for Terry O'Quinn to show up and smack him around a little for not doing the job right.
Really, and oddly, it was "family-friendly" horror and I just can't play with that and maybe that's why I'm so hard on it. This movie SHOULD have been a hard R and it should have been tricked out Silence of the Lambs style. Instead, it was the Fuzzy Pumper Monster Shop of slasher/thrillers. They didn't even show any decent horror trailers with it. Hell, they showed a trailer for that damn Michael Jackson movie. Granted, that was pretty damn scary.
Frankly, the best part of the movie was the large, black lady sitting next to Oscar who, in stereotypical fashion, would not shut up. There were also the giggling teenagers next to me who were... well... giggling. A lot.
I'm not saying skip it because it's not bad, but I would probably say wait to rent it because it's not great, either.
Jeez, I can't wait for Saw 6.
On the other hand, I also caught Deadgirl today. (I love working from home.)
This was pretty frikkin' brilliant.
It takes some explaining, and I'm not sure if I can do it without spoilers. It's pretty intense for a low-budget semi-supernatural do and it digs into "what would you do if there appeared to be no consequences for your actions and how would you react once you found out that there were". All I can say is that you'll either love it or you'll hate it.
I will say that it's pretty bleak apart from a kinda funny black comedy sequence towards the end. There are no characters that you'll really like and a lot that you'll frankly hate. Even the titular dead girl. For the parents out there, nudity aside, keep the kids away from this one due to subject matter alone. |
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| Catching up... |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|03:25 pm] |
I'm catching up on Glee.
Coach Whatshername is HILARIOUS!
"Ginger pygmy"...
HILARIOUS! |
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| Ahem... |
[Oct. 14th, 2009|04:06 pm] |
I'd like to direct your attention here.
That is all. |
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| Novocaine. |
[Oct. 13th, 2009|02:17 pm] |
I had a filling done, today.
Ya know what I love?
When the dentist tells you not to swallow while he's doing his thing in there.
Only not so much, because it's pretty much not possible. |
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| Oh, Deadpool, you little scamp. |
[Oct. 12th, 2009|01:40 pm] |
Extras in games are fun. Particularly extras that play up to breaking the 4th wall.
If you're playing Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2, check out the audio log "Deadpool vs VV".
"Paper-and-dice-playing, prom-skipping nerd-hole". Hilarious! |
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| What Big Eyes You Have... |
[Oct. 10th, 2009|02:36 am] |
ZOMG!
Trick 'r Treat!
Seriously? It's the new Creepshow. It's THAT FUCKING AWESOME!
Why the FUCK this didn't get a theatrical release is completely friggin' beyond me.
Stoopid Warner. |
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| WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!! |
[Oct. 9th, 2009|11:57 pm] |
Paranormal Activity.
Not the best horror film ever, but it certainly had it's share of creepy and shocking moments.
It plays like a series of videos taken by a "normal" couple so it's kind of Blair Witch-esque only without the nasal snot bubble. It's also not really Dramamine-worthy, but if you're especially sensitive, you might want to take some.
There were parts that were downright silly and they really could have played up the tension better, but all-in-all it was chilling enough to get a "go see it" from me.
And it's better to see it with a lot of people because screamers are extra fun. |
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| AAAAAAAAAAH!!!! |
[Oct. 8th, 2009|05:53 pm] |
Klaus Nomi's version of The Twist.
No, I will not post a link here.
It's that fucking creepy.
Listening to it I envisioned my soul being sucked out of my body through my ears.
I felt as if nothing would ever be happy again and that Chubby Checker was just a distant glimmer of hope.
People should be playing this instead of Halloween sound effects.
Why, oh, why, does this version of the song EXIST!
OH, and then there's THIS!!!
HAL the computer has NOTHING on making this song creepy like these guys do. I'm scared for Daisy. She's gonna end up chained in a basement wasting away while this sicko rewards her for emptying her chamberpot by letting her ring a damn bell. CALL the FUCKING POLICE! |
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| I Want An Easter Egg! |
[Oct. 5th, 2009|02:18 pm] |
Yeah, so... for those of you playing Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2...
Watch the credits after you beat the game.
No, seriously.
It's funny shit. |
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| Cotton Candy and Braaaaaiiiiins.... |
[Oct. 4th, 2009|11:25 am] |
You all know I love Shaun of the Dead, right?
Zombieland is BETTER!
"Shaun" is and always will be a classic of British Horror cinema, but Zombieland is like what would happen if John Landis had combined American Werewolf in London with Animal House.
There's a subtle difference here. While both are ROMZOMCOMs, Shaun is more of the ROM while Zombieland is more of the COM. It was laugh-out-loud funny. So much so that the ZOM was pretty much secondary. It was also sweet and touching in places. I never thought that Woody Harrelson would ever make me tear up. Of course, we all know that I'm a weepy geek, anyway.
On the subject of geeks, one thing I will say is that, while I appreciate the studio folks recognizing that nerds are hot, I'm kind of tired of seeing them as leading men. Once or twice, fine, but the underdog does not always win. I guess I wouldn't have a problem with the whole current Hollywood nerd trend if they weren't all the trendy hipster nerds with their throwback to the 70s look. Not all of us look like we stepped out of Napoleon Dynamite (a film I'm PROUD to have never seen). And I get the whole "Woody Allen" approach to the neurotic leading man, but dang. Grow a pair, son. |
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| The Sounds, The Lights |
[Oct. 2nd, 2009|01:02 pm] |
Heroes has given me a character to care about.
Her power isn't useful, in the standard sense of the word, but Emma's concept is standard but beautiful.
You see, if you don't watch the show, Emma is profoundly deaf and is discovering the ability to see sound. In the real world, this is known as synaesthesia. Not having experienced this myself, I can't tell you how it works in real life, but the depiction on the show is beautiful.
Something awful is going to happen to her, I know it. |
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| BEST. GRAIGSLIST AD. EVAR!!! |
[Sep. 29th, 2009|12:50 pm] |
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Wanted: Pony "My kid is having a birthday coming up soon, and there'll be a lot of children around, so I figured I'd better get a pony. If you do have a pony you could sell, please contact me, and then immediately start putting barbeque sauce in it's bedding or add some Lawry's to it's salt lick - I like to marinade it early and long, so that the flavor is at it's peak by the time I take possession." |
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| Dr. Doolittle? Is That You? |
[Sep. 28th, 2009|11:40 am] |
As much as I love our travel-sized hotties, I shall no longer refer to "Pocket Bears" as such.
If the skinny hairy guys can get their own sub-classification as "Otters", so can the short ones.
They are henceforth to be referred to as "Hamsters".
Because not only are they fuzzy and round, but they are also small. This makes them extra cute. Kawaii, if you will.
Plus, you run the risk of "Short Guy Syndrome" in which many of them are very angry for being short and hamsters just really aren't as nice as people think they are. Misplaced anger is hot. |
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| Umm, Ow. |
[Sep. 26th, 2009|12:16 pm] |
First, let me SQUEEEEE that Dollhouse is back. YAY! That makes me all tingly.
Second, I absolutely HATE ab work, it hurts, but I do it along with more cardio and lower back work to get rid of some of these love handles. Along with that, I've put myself on a diet. I'm reducing my caffeine/soda intake and reducing portions again. The belly should be greatly reduced by the time I go home for Thanksgiving.
This has nothing to do with me. I just refuse to go home not looking better than my brother. |
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| Origins |
[Sep. 25th, 2009|03:10 pm] |
Yeah, so I watched X-Men Origins: Wolverine again... not the work-print this time.
Still hate it.
Still hate what they did to Deadpool.
Still hate what they did to Emma Frost.
Still hate that they cast Liev Schreiber as Sabretooth.
Still hate Wolverine in general.
Hate, hate, hate.
Hate.
No, really. Hate. |
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| Santa, You Naughty Boy. |
[Sep. 23rd, 2009|10:09 am] |
Somewhere in the vicinity of 1991, Robert Devereaux stepped into the Splatterpunk arena with Santa Steps Out.
Oh. My. GAWD!
It's FUCKING FABULOUS!
It's disgusting and twisted and profane and pornographic in the BEST senses of the words. It's like every bit of Santa Claus/Mrs Claus/Easter Bunny/Elf 'ship-porn on the internet sprang from the loins of this one book. In the foreward, the author's friend mentions "The Loss of Innocence in Disneyland" (also called "Disneyland Memorial Orgy"), a poster drawn by Wally Wood. It's like that, only with a metric ass-ton of violence thrown in the mix.
And the Tooth Fairy. Oh, the Tooth Fairy. A bone-munching, coin-shitting animalistic MINX!
Oh, yes, these are not the holiday icons of our youth, that's for sure.
I'm not quite through it, yet, but I already highly endorse it. |
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| *snrk* |
[Sep. 21st, 2009|11:38 pm] |
Yes, I'm still Heroes' bitch.
But at least this time around we have something like an actual supervillian and not some Xanatos Gambit by Mrs. Petrelli.
Plus we get Twisty Circus! I loves the Twisty Circus. It's my favoritist trope ever.
And along with that? Lydia the Tattooed Lady. I'm serious. It's awesome. |
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| Preparedness. |
[Sep. 21st, 2009|10:29 am] |
I have registered for next year's Dragon*Con, made the vacation request and booked the hotel AT THE CON RATE... none of that debacle from last year.
I'm starting to save for the room now and I think I may plan a costume or two. I'm also thinking of how I can avoid paying a million dollars for parking. Usually I show up the day before and stay at a friends' place for the night and just leave my car there. This is something that can be worked out relatively last minute, though.
I'm now taking bids for Con Roomie(s), though... anything that can save me cash is a good thing.
Con Roomies will be locked out periodically with possibly little warning and must be prepared for this eventuality. I expect no less on my side. |
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| A few things. |
[Sep. 19th, 2009|12:42 am] |
First one is a bit of a downer.
It appears that Guinness has given the world record to Mexico. Frankly, I'm a little pissed about this because they didn't follow Guinness' rules about it. They danced to the 3 minute version while we danced to the 6 minute version and I highly doubt that they filed the proper paperwork.
We'll wait and see. The organizer of our event is contesting the decision. I understand that they deserve recognition, but maybe for a different record than the one we were shooting for.
We'll have to try harder next year.

Oh, and There's a better version of the video, here.
Second: Jennifer's Body.
It was enjoyable. Not the best of horror flicks, but eye candy enough. Megan Fox was OK. Physically she did push herself a bit and that was appreciated. The only things that really bothered me was that it was a little disjointed, the body count could have been higher, the plot needed tightening and Ms. Fox needs to stop sounding like Shirley Temple in heat. I don't expect much from horror movies but I prefer when they either make me think or are really gory. This was somewhere in-between and it fell just a little flat. I do like that most of it was prosthetics and not CGI, though. |
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| Speechless. |
[Sep. 18th, 2009|05:07 pm] |
Now, I don't watch "So You Think You Can Dance" or "Dancing With the Stars" because other shows conflict, but occasionally I catch nuggets.
Maybe it's my love of the creepy and surreal but THIS is amazing.
THIS is even MORE amazing.
It sounds like the second is still Roisin Murphy, but what's the name of the tune? |
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| Johnny Are You Queer? |
[Sep. 17th, 2009|11:35 pm] |
Poor Johnny.
So cute.
So stupid.
Such a liar.
This is not to say that I wouldn't still fuck him, but I wouldn't feel bad about making him cry anymore. The minute that incredible lie left his lips, I lost all respect for him.
Edit: SORRY! Johnny from Project Runway. I figured anyone who watched the show would get it. |
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| Boooooooo! |
[Sep. 12th, 2009|05:48 pm] |
Getting a call from a heartbroken sister sucks.
Now I have to do something about it. |
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| Officialness |
[Sep. 11th, 2009|03:29 pm] |
Still no word from Guinness, but they had 2 other attempts to review at the same time.
In any case, here's the Dragon*Con official video.
If you care to play "Where's Bob" I'm in a big segment starting at 1:25.
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